Dog

The last week that I was in Vietnam was one of the highlights of my trip. For safety reasons I'm not going to say where I was or who I was working with, but I will say that it was amazing. I had the chance to go to a three different drug rehab centers for where all they use is the Fathers word, worship, and the encouragement/ fellowship of each other to get clean. It's an amazing ministry, and I feel honored to have been exposed to it. I was able to sit with the men and hear their hearts and struggles. I was able to talk to them about my own experience with friends that struggle with drug addictions. The men even gave me advice on how to help my friends. It was so sweet and dear. It still blows my mind to think that these were some of the most dangerous men in Vietnam, and noww the Lord has filled them with such compassion and a heart to serve and love. They treated me with respect, and being a Brother in the word, they truly treated me like a sister. As one of my friends said , "It's hard just walking on the streets because guys look at me like I'm a piece of meat, but when I come across a believer it's so different. They respect me not only with their actions, but with their eyes."

The second rehab center I went to was an experience I will never forget. It started off with a long restful nap on the bamboo mat. I was woken up to someone informing me that dinner was ready. It smelled wonderful. Once we set the food on the floor we all sat in a circle and dug in. I asked what kind of meat we were eating and I was informed it was "baby cow". Seeing as how all 10 of the other Vietnamese people agreed I didn't think twice about it. After taking my first bite I looked around to see if anyone was watching and then spit it out in my napkin. It was terrible. I couldn't understand why it tasted so bad. I eventually had to eat it, because people kept putting the "best pieces" in my bowl. I remember asking the chef, who was sitting right across from me, "Wow, this is so good. Where did you learn to make this?" His response was, "Prison." I immediately started laughing and said, "Thats awesome." I also started getting really curious because everyone was speaking in Vietnamese and no one was translating what was going on. Everyone looked really suspicious. That's when I started to wonder if I was really eating baby cow.

After dinner we were informed to go outside for some fruit. I was the first to walk outside, but not the first to see what was waiting for us on the table. I was looking at Bekah who was screaming and yelling, "WHAT IS IT??? TELL MEEEE!!!" When I turned around a saw a dog head on a platter in the middle of all the fruit. We had been tricked. After about 10min. of looking at the dog head I started feeling so sick. I kept telling the guys that they needed to take it awa,y or I was going to hurl. They thought it was so funny. I'm pretty sure that they have the whole dinner on video. I guess it was kind of funny now that it's over.

Leaving Vietnam was terrible. I started crying while we were driving to the airport and I didn't stop until we arrived in Japan. Saying good-bye to such dear friends was so incredibly hard. When I actually had to say good-bye my dear friends just cried with me. Leaving Vietnam this past trip was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. Once I got on the plane and started to soar down the runway, I weeped. I weeped the whole way to Japan and Rebekah just held me. The sweet flight attendant ended up bringing me about 10 bags of peanuts in hopes of helping me feel better ha. At one point she even sat on the ground and was just rubbing my back. It was so sweet. Once I got to Japan I slept the entire 12 hours that we were in that airport. I don't know when I'm going back, but I know it wont be long. Vietnam is home, and Cambodia is a new place that is heavy on my heart. I already find myself researching language schools and social work jobs.

Eden of Asia

Waiting for Rebekah in the Hanoi airport I recollected my thoughts from the previous night in Nha Trang. My mom had given me enough money to enjoy a nice meal on the beach. As I sat their eating my "greek wrap" I couldn't help but watch all the people dinning around me. I noticed a lot of young couples, maybe honeymooners; I noticed a group of business men sharing a drink and laughing; I noticed two girls enjoying each others friendship over a warm pizza, but what caught my attention the most was the group sitting directly across from me. The group consisted of two older men sitting on both sides of a beautiful Vietnamese girl. I noticed the way she gestured her body towards them, and the placement of her hand on their shoulders and back. I noticed the fear in her eyes. I was there for a while so I also noticed how many drinks they continually kept buying her. I noticed the way the guys would look at each other and then at her in a way of saying "score". I no longer had an appetite. My heart broke for that young girl trapped in that horrible industry. I wanted to walk over to the table, tell those men how disgusting they were. I wanted to tell that beautiful innocent girl about the love of Jesus and how he could save her from that way of life. I wanted to give her hope. I wanted to strip away the glaze that covered her eyes, and tell her that she deserved a much better way of life even if no one else had ever told her that. I wanted to save her because I knew she was trapped. How do I not hate those men? I still don't have an answer to that question.

As I lay on the bench at the airport almost in tears, I couldn't have been happier to see my dear friend that I have talked about in earlier post. The friend that taught me about how to live out my faith, the friend that prayed over my struggling heart, the friend that I had already said good-bye to once. As I lay there with my eyes closed I felt a little tap on my shoulder. When I opened my eyes I immediately jumped out of my seat, dropped everything that was in my lap and gave him a huge hug. Seeing as how we don't speak much of the same language he spoke the little english he knew, "I so happy. I so happy." and I repeated, "I'm so happy too." Ten minutes later we were greeted by Rebekah walking out of the gate. Before leaving for our night train to Sapa we all enjoyed an amazing meal together.

When walking towards the train we were both squealing with excitement. After talking to my brother I was expecting to walk into train cabin that crammed 6 beds in one little room. He actually told us, "It was awful. I didn't sleep at all, and I couldn't even lay sideways because the beds were so close to each other." So walking into our cabin train Rebekah and I were shocked. Our dear friend asked if he could arrange our train tickets for us, and put us in a first class sleeper. We had down beds, slippers, tooth brush, and only 4 people to a cabin. It was a wonderful little surprise.

Getting off the train the next morning we were both feeling a little tired. The trains in Vietnam are not the smoothest trains in the world. There were a few times when I thought I was going to roll out of the top bunk. I remember bracing myself with the blankets (not that the blanket would have actually helped). walking off the train we were approached by people everywhere saying, "I take you to Sapa." Not really sure who I should trust I decided to go to the lady that was handing out tickets to Sapa. I think I made the right choice.

Driving into Sapa our bus was chased buy a group of funny little tribal women already trying to sell us their beautiful blankets, shirts, toys, and fruit. Rebekah and I couldn't do anything but laugh. After walking around the town for a little while we decided to go and talk to a travel guide. She hooked us up with a two day hike and homestay for an incredible deal.

We spent all morning hiking alongside beautiful tribal women and children. It was a pretty challenging hike, and those women were by our sides to help us the whole way. They were so fun to talk to. Most of them spoke english and loved to talk about their way of life and families. Once we got to the village, where we were going to sleep, we had a nice glass of green tea with our host family and got to know the three other people that were staying in the house with us. There was a french couple and son, a girl from holland, and a boy from Germany. I felt like I was living in the hostel world in Europe all over again. It was so much fun. Our Host mom was a hoot every time she would see Rebekah and I she would yell, "Amerdica!!!" I think she might have been a little bit crazy. Right before dinner Rebekah and I decided to go and explore the river. It felt like a fairytale. 5min. after playing on the rocks and taking a few pictures I went straight for the water. I decided I might as well wash my hair since it had been a few days :). The meal that we ate was wonderful. It was probably one of the best meals that I ate in Vietnam. We were also exposed to "rice wine". It was the local wine that they drink at dinnertime in the villages. After gagging from one little glass I decided to hide my cup so that they wouldn't pour me anymore. That night the fellow travelers, Rebekah, and I all sat outside, did yoga, and talked about life, family, and struggles. It was wonderful.

Waking up the next morning my body was hurting from the hard mat that I slept on and the hiking that I had done. I crawled down the stairs of the upper loft and made my way outside to eat crepes and bananas. After breakfast we continued our hike through rice fields, villages, bamboo forest, waterfalls, and the jungle. I remember myself continually stopping in my tracks, taking a few deep breathes, and thinking, "This is so beautiful. I don't want this moment to end. I wish I could freeze time. I don't want to go home!!!!" The rest of our time consisted of shopping in tribal markets, renting motorbikes and riding them through the mountains, and enjoying creation and good friendship.

As I walked the beaches of Nha Trang I took in the feeling of the rough sand in between my toes, the smell of the rain minutes away from falling from the sky, the beautiful women selling dried squid, the faces of the children trying to earn enough money to provide for their families, the European tourist wearing swimsuits that are ity ity bity, and the strange feeling of being alone. For the first time in Vietnam I am alone. I waved good-bye to the taxi that was filled with two wonderful friends, and my mamma. I am now in this beautiful city that the Lord created for me to enjoy, and I am alone. My head and mind can now work through so many things that I have heard, seen, and done. As I think about what the Lord has taught me on this trip I am flooded with an ocean full of emotions. I have met so many people that I long to be more like, but I'm not sure if I'm ready to make the sacrifices that they daily take. I'm not bold enough to stand firm, but I long to have that boldness...I guess thats a start. My prayer is that I will become more Bold for the Lord. That my prayers will not be a mundane thing, but they will be the cry of my heart. Tomorrow I fly to Hanoi where I will meet Rebekah Angel. Together we will take a night train up to the "Eden of Asia". We will be travel to Sapa to experience the tribal way of life, trek to the highest point of Vietnam, sleep on bamboo mats, rent and try to ride motorbikes through the jungle, and eat great food. I am very excited about part of my trip. We don't have to wory about time, or be at any specific place. We are just going to explore and end up where the Lord leads us. Did I mention I really love it here...I love the people; I love the heat; I love the food; and I love the way that believers live out their faith. If I had only one more day to live, I wouldn't want to be anywhere else.

Good-bye's

This week I weeped tears of sadness. I can't remember the last time I cried to the point of not being able to talk. I couldn't get another word out of my mouth. This happened while I was at the camp, but my tears weren't over any of the children. This time my tears were over a new and highly treasured friend. I had to say good-bye to this friend, and this was one of the hardest things that I've had to do in a long time. When I started to cry he grabbed my hand and weeped with me. I felt his heart and his pain. He has taught me more in the last few weeks thn I've learned in years. He opened my eyes to how I should be living. By getting closer to him I truly feel that I know our Father on a more intimate level. His testimony taught me about the Fathers forgiveness, love, and amazing pursuit of my heart. I truly love this man like a dear brother. I've never seen someone so excited about serving our Father, yet so broken and ready to go home. I am amazed by his faith and life. I will never be the same after meeting him.



This past week we put on a VBS camp for all my beautiful little babies. It was wonderful. My days started at 6am and ended at 12pm. We didn't waste one minute of any given day. They were filled with swimming, studying the word, crafts, games, more swimming, girl talks, more swimming, and even time to sing and praise. The team that I met up with to put on the camp was from my home town. I'm pretty sure we all slept really hard when we finally got to lay our heads down. I saw amazing things happen in the hearts of the children, especially our older ones.
Another high light of my week was being able to meet my five year old little boy (through our extended family program). I have committed to pray, write, and love on this little boy until the end of my time. He is our newest child in the homes. The first few days all he did was frown. My mom encouraged me to just keep loving him. It took a few days for me to be able to get a smile out of him, but he was eventually giggling, running up to me when he would see me, and he even fell asleep in my arms by the pool. It was such a sweet moment. I can't wait to watch him grow up.
I was also given the chance to counsel a few children, which will continue throughout the next few days. It's been really fun, but frustrating since I don't speak the language. I am now determined to learn this native tongue. A good friend, Amanda Bryant, and I both are determined.
I arrived to a new city today. A city that is somewhat familiar. I love new things. I am excited about that, and about being able to eat western food tonight. These last few weeks my diet has consisted of rice, squid, shrimp (with the shell and all), liver, noodle soup, and seaweed. I really do love the food, but something familiar is going to taste great tonight.






My health is great so thank you for praying for me. I love it here. I am already thinking about the terrible flight home :(. The Father has taught me so much, and put so many new people in my life that I know will be lifelong friends. People that understand my heart, and love my people. It's so rejuvenating.

Girl's don't just line up on the street corners here, they line up on the entire side of the road. They don't come out around mid-night, but they were lined up by the time of 7. I saw the desperation in their eyes...15, 16, 17, 18, 19 years old. They are still children themselves, and they are being forced to offer their bodies for money. If they do not show up with a certain amount of money the next morning. Their pimp will beat them! Prostitution has changed in Cambodia. There are less brothels, and more "entertainment centers". This has greatly complicated things. Men can now show up at an entertainment center, buy a girl, and then he has to take her off the premises to use her. This is bad because of two reasons. The first is that it has become much more difficult for the brothels to be raided and stopped. The second reason is that now a man can buy a young girl and show up at a hotel where 6 of his friends are waiting. She is not only used, but gang rapped. This is much more dangerous for the victim.
The night after we explored the red light districts of Cambodia we went to a village that is world wide known for child trafficking. 100% percent of these little girls are sold. Girls are actually brought up in this village in order to be trafficked for money. It is a terrible terrible terrible thing. We had the chance of walking this street, handing out candy, and showing the Lord's pure love. These little girls are absolutely beautiful, and their eyes were filled with such emptiness. They had a glaze over their eyes that no child should ever have. They have seen and been through more thn I will ever see or go through in my whole life. I wanted to pick them all up, make a run for it, and rescue them from the deep dark danger that they are living in, but all I could do was pick them up, look them in the eyes and say "depwa", which means, "you are BEAUTIFUL." Upon returning to the car Amanda and I cried out to the lord with tears of sadness. How could someone be so cruel? My life calling is to these children. With the Lord's help I AM going to help them! I have seen the need and now I must help. God we cry out for your children.

Walking out of the airport I take in the smell of fried rice, B.O, and everything else that seems to remind me of this beautiful place. I immediately remember the overwhelming feeling of walking out of the airport into a sea of people waiting for their loved ones to appear from the sliding doors. I just stood their taking it in, and trying to spot my little brother. Amanda, my mom and I were all searching the crowd wondering what to do, or where to go next. I loved it. I loved the sea of people. I loved the smells. I loved the feeling of being sticky because of the humidity that filled the air.
The only feeling that I didn't like was the tightness that I immediately felt in my chest. I pushed that aside thought, so that I could enjoy everything else. I remember Amanda and I both squealing with joy to be home.
The next day, Friday, We met up with our team that we would be traveling to Cambodia with. It is such a diverse team ranging from all ages, background, and even languages. It's actually amazing! On Friday we were able to walk around a little and basically rest. We also went to an amazing celebration to celebrate what our Father has done in this country. The stadium was filled with thousands of people, and where do they put us....On the very front row! It was amazing. I felt so honored to be a part of it.
On Saturday, I got to go with my mom and a few other people to visit our children in one of our homes. My heart was overflowing with excitement. Walking in the doors of the house I was immediately throwing my arms around a handful of beautiful, not so little anymore, girls. We were all squealing as we reunited. I can't believe how big they all are. I remember being able to pick them up and throw them in the air. Now they are teenagers and so beautiful! I can't wait to spend more time with them next week.
After visiting the home we went back to our hotel. At this point I could not avoid the feeling my heart was physically making. It was fluttering almost to the point of where it hurt. It has not done this before so I was starting to get pretty scared. No one likes to be sick in a foreign land, especially when it might be serious. I always know when my heart is not working right because I had heart surgery when I was 16 because It was beating way too fast. I immediately called my mom and told her something was wrong. She made her way back to our hotel where she prayed for me. At this point I was trying to be brave, but I just started crying because the last thing I wanted to do was to have to fly home. I had waited years to return to this country and I wasn't about to leave before I even adjusted to the time zone. My mom decided to go out and get me some gatorade thinking I might be dehydrated. When walking out of the hotel she felt as though she was supposed to ask one of the men on our team to pray for me.
It was truly amazing because she ran into him when walking out of the hotel. She immediately told him that my health was not good, and it was something to do with my heart. Seeing as how this man didn't even speak english, he later told me that he knew that my mom was concerned about me and it had something to do with my heart. About 10min. later he came up to my room, put his hands on me, and prayed for me. He encouraged me and told me that all things happen for a purpose, and through this God was going to show his power to me. After praying for me I took a 4 hour nap, woke up and felt 90% better. My heart was no longer fluttering or hurt. The Lord is so good! I truly believe I was healed. Ohhh the power of prayer.